oldEpisode Four-hundred-forty-one: While
Doing her Show Jennifer Gets Some Pains,
Causing Jack,Who Is Watching at Home,
to Believe She Is Going into Labor. So
He Flies to New York to Be with Her.

[Air date late September 1992]

 

SCENE ONE: A FEW DAYS LATER AND JACK COMES HOME TO FIND THE LANDLORD WAITING OUTSIDE THE APARTMENT HOLDING A BABY'S CAR SEAT.

 

LANDLORD: When I saw that thing outside your door I knew the kid was due soon.

JACK: I didn't know anything about this. Tell me where the hell it came from.

LANDLORD: Some dame named Williams left it. Look I told you from day one. No kid. Especially no screaming babies allowed in my building. Now when are you getting out.

JACK: What do you mean, when am I.... I don't know when I'm getting out. I'm working on it. I'm working on it all right. Now just.... I have one month to go right. I've got a month.

LANDLORD: As long as you vacate before the kid arrives. Get it?

JACK: I got it.

LANDLORD: Good.

 

THE LANDLORD WALKS OUT AND JACK SCREAMS AFTER HIM.

 

JACK: And so much for those family values we hear so much about.

 

HE SHUTS THE DOOR AND CHECKS HIS WATCH.

 

JACK: And speaking of family values. It will soon be value family work to on here. Jennifer, brighten up the day a little.

 

HE TURNS ON THE TV.

SCENE TWO: JENNIFER AND CALLIOPE'S SHOW IS ABOUT EXERCISE. JENNIFER WATCHES CALLIOPE AND THE INSTRUCTOR. SUDDENLY SHE STARTS TO FEEL FUNNY AND BEGINS SOME HEAVY BREATHING.

SCENE THREE: JACK IS WATCHING AND REALIZES THAT JENNIFER IS NOT OKAY.

 

JACK: Jennifer? Jennifer, what the hell's going on? What are you doing?
oldEp441A
JACK: Don't do it! Don't do it! Don't let it be now. DON'T LET IT BE NOW.

 

JACK GRABS THE PHONE.

 

JACK: Hello operator. I'd like to make a person to person call to Jennifer Deveraux in New York City. That's 212-555-8255. (Beat) This is her husband Jack Deveraux. Please this is an emergency. Please, thank you. (Beat) Please Jennifer.... please.

 

WHILE HE IS HOLDING ON, JO WALKS IN THE DOOR.

 

JO: Did you see it? Did you see it?

JACK: Did I see what?

JO: Jennifer's show. She's in labor. She's in labor.

JACK: Really, really? I thought I was just having trouble with my set.

JO: It's too early. I mean what if her water's broken?

JACK: There's nothing broken. I'm just on hold. Do you understand that? I'm just on hold. I'm just trying to get through.

JO: Do you have any idea what they say about eight month babies? Do you have any idea?

JACK: No I don't and I don't want to hear about it. Do you understand that?

JO: But Jack....

JACK: I don't want to hear about it.

JO: .... what if her water is broken.

JACK: I want you to go to the apartment.

JO: Yes.

JACK: Make a call.

JO: Okay.

JACK: Call La Guardia Airport.

JO: Call La Guardia Airport.

JACK: First flight to La Guardia Airport. Now go, go, please.

JO: Okay.

JACK: Go, go, go, go, go, GO!

 

JO HURRIES TO HER APARTMENT.

 

JACK: Good.

 

JACK PICKS UP THE PHONE AGAIN.

 

JACK: Right, anyone there? (Beat) Still holding. Stop this please. Don't do this yet.

SCENE FOUR: BACK IN NEW YORK, JENNIFER IS CHECKED OUT BY THE NURSE ON STAFF AND TOLD THAT SHE'S NOT READY TO DELIVER YET. THE PHONE RINGS AND CALLIOPE ANSWERS IT.

 

CALLIOPE: Hello.

JACK: Calliope, it's Jack. How's Jennifer?

CALLIOPE: Oh she's fine now Jack. We've got a nurse with her.

JACK: A nurse. Can I talk to her?

CALLIOPE: The nurse?

JACK: No, no, Jennifer.

CALLIOPE: Oh sure hang on but there's nothing to be worried about. Jennifer is fine. (To Jennifer) It's Jack.

JENNIFER: He must have seen me on the show and had a heart attack. Hi.

JACK: Calliope says you're all right. Is that the truth?

JENNIFER: Yes Jack, I'm fine. You know what it was just a false labor pain.

JACK: Yes, this one was false. The next one could be all too real.

JENNIFER: Well the next one I'm going to be at home.

JACK: Yes, you'll be at home all right. I'm coming to New York.

JENNIFER: You are? Why?

JACK: To get you. I'm getting you out of there. I'm bringing you back home with me. We aren't going to take anymore chances. Do you understand that?

SCENE FIVE: IT IS LATER IN THE DAY AND JENNIFER GETS SOME MORE REASSURANCE FROM THE NURSE ABOUT IT BEING FALSE LABOR.

 

JENNIFER: I'm so glad. I thought I was going to have to deliver my baby in front of ten million people. I mean I know we need ratings but the network pressure has to stop somewhere don't you think?

 

AT THAT MOMENT JACK BURSTS ONTO THE SET WHERE JENNIFER IS SITTING WITH THE NURSE.

 

JACK: Well it damn well better. How are you feeling?

JENNIFER: JACK! I can't believe that you're really here.

 

SHE GIVES HIM A HUGE HUG. SHE IS OVERJOYED SEEING HIM.

 

JACK: Wait a minute, of course I'm here. I told you I'd be here.

JENNIFER: Yeah but I can't believe that you made it. You're here.

JACK: Yes I am. Listen take it easy please, please. Don't push anything, don't.... don't upset yourself in any way.

JENNIFER: What? I'm not upset. I haven't been this happy since the day I married you.

JACK: Well, I know I was late for that event but at least I'm on time for this one.
oldEp441B
NURSE: Well don't hold your breath Mr. Deveraux. Ah, she's still got about another month.

JACK: Another month? (Beat) Are you sure you can hang on that long?

JENNIFER: I can as long as you can.

 

SHE GIVES HIM A BIG KISS. THE NURSE LEAVES.

SCENE SIX: A SHORT TIME LATER, THEY ARE NOW ALONE.

 

JENNIFER: As soon as I felt that first twinge I thought that Jack is going to be very mad at me for starting without him.

JACK: No, no, I wasn't mad. I was.... actually I was thinking that you were having doubts.

 

JENNIFER IS PUZZLED.

 

JENNIFER: What? What.... doubts?

JACK: Doubts.... you know after the.... after the way that I talked about the baby. I mean about the way that.... you know, not being sure that we should have it. I mean all the way here I kept thinking that maybe this....

oldEp441C

JACK: ....this is what you wanted, all along. Maybe you wanted to come here on your own. Maybe in the end you wanted to have the baby here in New York without me.

JENNIFER: Wait a minute. Do you really think that I would to that to you?

JACK: Maybe not consciously.... but subconsciously.... yes. (Beat) In any event I made a decision. I've made a decision and I don't want any arguments from you about it either.

JENNIFER: Well I won't until you tell me what this decision is.

JACK: We're going back to Salem.

JENNIFER: Well of course we're going back to Salem, Jack.

JACK: We're going back to Salem tonight.

JENNIFER: What?

JACK: We're going to Salem tonight. There's no arguments about it. That's just the way that it is. No....

JENNIFER: Wait a minute, Jack, that's impossible. I have two weeks left. I still have ten more shows that I have to do.

JACK: I don't care. They're just going to have to shoot around you.

 

HE LOOKS UP TOWARDS THE STUDIO OFFICES

 

JACK: (Shouting) DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? We've got a flight out of La Guardia in the next hour. We're going back to S....

JENNIFER: Flight? Do you think that any airline is going to let me on their airplane looking like this?

JACK: What are you saying to me? Do you think you're going to deliver at thirty thousand feet?

JENNIFER: Well the nurse said that I'll probably go full term but who knows. I mean, what if we hit an air pocket? What if....

JACK: All right, all right. We'll forget about the air. We'll just travel over the terra firma as.... quickly and as firma as the car will take us. We'll skip all the air pockets. And I tell you something, if the car breaks down, if there's any trouble with the tires, I won't make you get out and change them.

JENNIFER: So all we have to do is find a rent-a-car then.

JACK: Absolutely. I mean, there was a place on the way in. I just saw a place on the way in. It was Rent-a.... Rent-a....

JENNIFER: Rent-a-Heap.

JACK: Rent-a-Heap. That's it. It's the perfect place. It's convenient and very economical and it's guaranteed not to go over the speed limit though.

JENNIFER: Well it better not.

 

JENNIFER STANDS UP AND JACK HELPS HER.

 

JENNIFER: Well you know this could be a real adventure for us Jack. You realize that?

JACK: No, no, no. We're not counting on any kind of adventure at all. No adventure at all. I just want you to make sure that when we get back to Salem, it's just you and me in that car.

JENNIFER: As long as you make sure that you don't hit any pot holes on the way.

JACK: I give you my word. (Beat) You're not afraid are you?

JENNIFER: No, I'm never afraid as long as we're together.

JACK: As long as we're together and.... as long as we're together.... it's going to be all right. (Beat) Thank you.... Mrs. Deveraux. I love you.

 

HE KISSES HER.

 

JENNIFER: I love you too Jack. So what do you say? Let's go home.

JACK: Yes, let's go home.

 

THEY STAND FACING EACH OTHER AND HOLDING HANDS.

 

JENNIFER: Okay, let's go home.

oldEp441D

THEY WALK OFF THE SET.

 

JACK: Say goodnight, Gracie. JENNIFER: Goodnight, Gracie.

 

[Transcribed by Carol Vaughan
added material by Sally A. Wilson]