oldEpisode Five-hundred-fourteen:
"It's Un-me": Jack Takes Jennifer to
the Airport Runway to Shout at Planes.

[Air date late April, 1993]

 

SCENE ONE: A SHORT TIME LATER, THEY HAVE BOTH CHANGED INTO JEANS AND SHIRTS.

 

JENNIFER: Is everything okay?

 

JACK IS PUTTING OUT THE CANDLES WITH WET FINGERTIPS.

 

JACK: Yes everything is just.... just fine.

JENNIFER: Oh good. We've got to thank Jo big time for taking Abby overnight.

JACK: Absolutely. Absolutely not. You know she loves this sort of thing. She's taken.... taken to calling her a...a little doll.

 

JACK IS STILL PUTTING OUT CANDLES AND BURNING HIS FINGERS.

 

JENNIFER: Well she is a doll, you know.

JACK: You want my unbiased opinion?

JENNIFER: Yes.

JACK: She is the ideal. The standard by which all other children must be held accountable. How is that for unbiased?

JENNIFER: I think that's pretty accurate reporting.

JACK: Good. Let's get out of here before it's too late.

JENNIFER: Let's get out of here? Wait, you still haven't told me where we're going.

JACK: Aaaah, it's.... not a place you'd expect me to take you.

JENNIFER: Why?

oldEp514A

JACK: It's.... it's un-me. It's, ah, at least the me that most people think they know.

JENNIFER: You're really something tonight. I like it.

JACK: I'm just not obsessing about work, that's all. Señorita?

 

HE HOLDS OUT HIS ARM FOR HER.

 

JENNIFER: Vamanos.

JACK: Yes.

oldEp514B

SCENE TWO: A SHORT TIME LATER THEY ARE LYING ON THE HOOD OF JACK'S CAR LOOKING UP AT THE SKY.

 

JENNIFER: Jack, this is totally un-you. If anybody would of told me that I'd be lying on the hood of a car out at the end of an airport runway I'd say they were crazy.

JACK: All right, here comes one.

 

THE SOUND OF A PLANE TAKING OFF GETS LOUDER AND LOUDER.

 

JACK: Here comes one. It looks like a 747.

JENNIFER: Isn't that a bit close Jack?

JACK: Always and it's going to get a little bit closer.

JENNIFER: What do you mean?

JACK: Another half mile.... AAAAARRRRRGGGHHHH WHOOOOOOO, YES!

 

JACK SCREAMS AS LOUD AS HE CAN AS THE PLANE TAKES OFF OVER THEM.

 

JACK: HAHAHAHAH. That was a good one wasn't it? Was it good for you? It was good for me.

JENNIFER: Gosh.

JACK: Yes.

JENNIFER: Yes, that was wonderful.

JACK: Yes.

JENNIFER: When's the next one?

JACK: Oh quite the rush now, isn't it? Yes.

JENNIFER: Yeah that was great. That was really great.

JACK: Good. I used to do this when I was but a child sitting out the edge of a runway in Washington DC. Dullus airport to be exact.

JENNIFER: Love the yell Jack.

oldEp514C

JACK: Oh, that was kind of a release I guess.

JENNIFER: Release from what?

JACK: Oh, release from.... from.... from life.... from.... from before.... from.... well life was different before when my father was really on the up and up. When Senator Harper Deveraux was a rising star in the political constellation of Washington DC. Breakfast with the President. Lunch and golf with the Secretary of State. Dinner and drinks with any number of network executives. One of them on their chat show. And Anjelica.... well Anjelica was the rising young queen of Washington society. There was one long party, non-stop. People just coming and going, thousands of them, coming and going and no one ever stopping to talk.... at least not to me. (Beat) Made me want to yell. Want to wake them up, shake them up. Do something. And I would have but knowing how Harper and Angelica were I.... I really.... I went looking for something else to yell at.

JENNIFER: And you found the airplanes.

JACK: And they found me. And it was love at first sight. It was that ability to just.... pick up and run away and go anywhere. You know, the wander lust of youth and all that. A bit more of a tribute than a release really.

JENNIFER: And you'd just lie out there on the end of the runway.

JACK: Oh yes, yes. I'd just lie out there.

JENNIFER: And what would have happened if you'd been caught?

JACK: I was. I was caught. I was. First time I ever met the press. "SENATOR'S SON ARRESTED ON".... "ON AIRPORT RUNWAY."

JENNIFER: You got arrested?

JACK: Oh yes, yes. DC's finest dragged me off the runway and threw me in the paddy wagon. The senator was fit to be tied. He was furious with me. Said I.... said I.... said I just scandalized him. Then he packed me up and sent me off to yet another prep school. I don't know why I was surprised really. I mean he told me over and over again that I'd never amount to anything in his eyes. I know he meant it. I mean even years later here in Salem I tried to be a local politician. He'd say it's in the blood but.... in his eyes he meant, you'll never cut it in DC or anywhere else. You'll never really amount to anything.

JENNIFER: That's a really rotten thing to tell someone.

JACK: Oh it doesn't really matter. I mean look how he ended up. Really ironic isn't it? The point is, it was over a long time ago and I've gotten over it.

 

JENNIFER STROKES HIS FACE.

 

JACK: So how about you? How would you like to do this?

 

SHE THINKS ABOUT IT BUT CHICKENS OUT.

 

JENNIFER: I don't think I want to do it.

JACK: Oh come on now.

JENNIFER: No. JACK: Don't you need a release? I mean isn't there somebody in your life who....

oldEp514D

JACK: ....who frustrates you, annoys you, ignores you, angers you? Is there somebody in your life like that?

 

JENNIFER SMILES.

 

JACK: I thought as much. Just in time. Here one comes.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack.

JACK: A big one.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack, I....

JACK: It's going to be a big one. Here it comes. Go ahead, take a deep breath. AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!

JENNIFER: AAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

 

JENNIFER LAYS BACK AND KICKS HER LEGS AND SPREADS HER ARMS.

 

JACK: That's right. Keep it going. AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

SCENE THREE: THEY STAY THERE AND CONTINUE TO SCREAM AT THE PLANES AS THEY TAKE OFF AND LAND.

 

JACK AND JENNIFER: WHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!

JACK: Whoa Jennifer, we'll have the Salem PD down on us in no time at all.

JENNIFER: AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

JACK: Jen.... Jennifer! Take it easy, take it easy.

JENNIFER: I love this. I love this Jack. You know what, we are going to start making a regular thing out of this, okay?

JACK: Well I thought about the two of us doing this before but.... but....

JENNIFER: But what?

JACK: .... it just.... it didn't seem like something we should do.

JENNIFER: Well shoot to hell with should. Let's just do it.

 

THEY KISS PASSIONATELY.

 

JENNIFER: Thank you. Thank you for taking time for us again.

JACK: Certainly. I....

 

HE STROKES HER HAIR.

 

JACK: .... I do want to be a success. You know that? I do. You know that's important to me. I just.... we're not going to talk about that tonight. That's business.

JENNIFER: Your father was wrong you know.

 

JACK SQUINTS AND LOOKS UP AT THE SKY.

 

JENNIFER: You've already amounted to so much Jack.

JACK: Look I'm never going to live up to his standards but that doesn't really matter because he couldn't live up to his standards either. I mean it doesn't change things though. I'm a Deveraux, till the day I die.

JENNIFER: Jack.

JACK: TILL THE DAY I DIE! And that means dying in my own bed, we hope, with a lot of money all over me.

JENNIFER: Listen to me. You are smart, you are educated, you have been everywhere and you have done everything. You're married, you have a beautiful child. Why isn't that enough for you?

oldEp514E

JACK: It's.... it's not me. It's you. It's the two of you. You.... you both deserve more.

JENNIFER: We don't want more.

JACK: You're going to get more whether you like it or not.

JENNIFER: I don't mean to discourage you but what happens if you don't get the paper back?

JACK: I said I wasn't going to talk about business and I'm determined to keep that promise.

 

HE GETS OFF THE HOOD.

 

JENNIFER: What are you doing?

JACK: Oh, just getting a little mood music.

JENNIFER: What kind of mood are we looking for?

JACK: Well, it's not that the end of a runway is not good for letting out your frustrations on planes and things like that but there are a couple of other activities I can think of.

JENNIFER: Oh.

 

HE WALKS AROUND TO THE SIDE OF THE CAR AND SHE SLIDES OVER AND WRAPS HER LEGS AROUND HIM.

 

JENNIFER: Why don't you tell me about them?

JACK: Oh I think I've said enough for one night.

 

HE STARTS TO KISS HER AS A PLANE COMES OVER.

 

JENNIFER: AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 

HE PULLS HER FACE BACK TO HIM AND CAPTURES HER SCREAM WITH A KISS. THEY CLIMB INTO THE BACK OF THE CAR.

SCENE FOUR: A WHILE LATER WE HEAR THE RADIO.

 

RADIO: And we're taking time here for a short B&B. That's business break for all you lovers out there. And I know you're there. Follow the crowd to the Salem Inn and hear noted investment banker Clayton Robards discuss....

oldEp514F

JACK'S HEAD POPS UP TO LISTEN.

 

RADIO: ...Making the 90s Pay Off. Feather your nests lovers.

 

JENNIFER SITS UP TOO.

 

JENNIFER: What's wrong?

JACK: Aaah, Clayton Robards is in Salem.

JENNIFER: So?

JACK: I.... I know the man, that's all. Nothing.

 

HE KISSES HER AND THEY LIE BACK DOWN. SUDDENLY SHE SITS UP AGAIN.

 

JENNIFER: Wait a minute.

JACK: What?

JENNIFER: Clayton Robards is an investor.

JACK: Yes, that is right.

JENNIFER: The very thing that you are looking for.

JACK: As a matter of fact, I was trying to contact the man earlier but he was on one of his globe trotting jaunts.

JENNIFER: All right but now he's in Salem so why don't you give him a call?

JACK: I said I wouldn't talk about investments Jennifer and I.... I meant it.

 

HE KISSES HER AGAIN.

 

JENNIFER: No wait a minute, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait! Guess what we're going to do? All right, this is what we're going to do. We're going to go home. You're going to get Clayton Robards on the phone. You're going to get him to lend you money for The Spectator, okay.

JACK: Jennifer.

JENNIFER: No. No arguments Jack. This is what you want. This is what I want. So go do it.

JACK: All right. All right I will or better yet, we will . We're going to do it Jennifer. We're going to do it.... we're going to take off from this moment on.

oldEp514G

JACK: We'll come back here one of these days. One of these days soon so just keep your calendar open.

JENNIFER: Time's a wastin' Jack.

JACK: Right. Boy, I don't know why but I've got a good feeling. I got a very good feeling about this, a very very good feeling about this.

 

HE GIVES HER A QUICK KISS AND CLIMBS OUT OF THE CAR JUST AS ANOTHER PLANE GOES OVER.

 

JACK: WWWWWHHHHHHOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAA.... WWWWWWWHHHHHHHOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA.... YES!

 

JENNIFER SMILES AS SHE LISTENS TO HIM.

[Transcribed by Carol Vaughan
added material by Sally A. Wilson]